Author: Maisie Thompson, Paediatric Occupational Therapist
4 Min Read
Change is part of life, from tiny daily shifts like packing away toys, to big milestones like starting a new school year. But for many kids, transitions can feel overwhelming, confusing, or even scary.
It’s important to understand that transitions are a skill, one that develops over time, with support, practice, and a lot of compassion.
Why Are Transitions So Tricky for Kids?
Transitions ask children to stop what they’re doing, shift their attention, manage their emotions, and adapt to something new. That’s a lot of complex brain work!
Some reasons transitions can feel especially hard for kids include:
- Executive functioning demands: Moving from one task to another requires planning, organising, and flexible thinking. All skills that are still developing in young brains.
- Emotional attachment: Kids often deeply connect to what they’re doing in the moment. Ending a preferred activity can feel like a genuine loss.
- Sensory needs: If a child is already feeling dysregulated (hungry, tired, overstimulated), transitions can feel even harder.
- Anxiety about the unknown: Predictability helps kids feel safe. Unfamiliar or unexpected changes can trigger uncertainty and stress.
None of these challenges are about “being difficult.” They are signs that a child needs support, not pressure.
What Does a Difficult Transition Look Like?
Every child is different, but some common signs that a transition is tough might include:
- Meltdowns, crying, or yelling
- Withdrawal or shutdown
- Refusing to move on to the next activity
- Appearing overwhelmed, distracted, or anxious
- Becoming physically restless or aggressive
It’s important to remember: when kids are struggling with transitions, they’re not giving you a hard time, they’re having a hard time.
How to Support Smoother Transitions
You can make transitions easier and more predictable for your child with a few simple strategies:
1. Give Warnings Before a Change
Giving advance notice helps kids prepare mentally and emotionally. A simple “In 5 minutes, we’ll be packing up to go home” gives them time to adjust.
Using visual timers or countdowns can also help, especially for kids who find time concepts tricky.
2. Use Visual Supports
Visual schedules, step-by-step charts, or “first-then” boards can show kids exactly what’s coming next. Visuals take the pressure off memory and verbal processing.
For example:
First: Finish playing at the park
Then: Go home for snack time
3. Keep Routines Predictable (When You Can)
Predictability builds a sense of safety. While life can’t always be completely routine, having predictable patterns for common transitions (like bedtime or getting ready for school) helps children feel more secure.
When changes are unavoidable, preview them gently and as early as possible.
4. Validate Their Feelings
It’s okay for kids to feel sad, frustrated, or anxious about change. Instead of rushing past these feelings, acknowledge them:
“It’s hard to leave when you’re having so much fun. I understand.”
Validation helps kids feel seen and supported, and it actually makes moving forward easier.
5. Offer Choices When Possible
Offering small choices gives kids a sense of control during transitions.
For example:
“Would you like to carry your backpack or your lunchbox to the car?”
This empowers children without overwhelming them.
6. Create Transition Rituals
Simple, consistent rituals, like a special goodbye wave at school drop-off or a song you sing before leaving the playground, can create comfort and predictability around change.
7. Allow Extra Time
Transitions take longer when emotions are big. Building “buffer time” into your day helps you avoid rushing and keeps things more peaceful for everyone.
Final Thoughts
Transitions aren’t just “little moments”; they are important opportunities for connection, growth, and trust-building.
When we approach transitions with empathy, predictability, and patience, we’re not just helping kids move from one activity to the next; we’re supporting their emotional regulation, building their resilience, and showing them that it’s safe to trust the world around them.
Every child deserves the time and support they need to navigate change at their own pace. With the right scaffolding, they can learn that while change can feel hard, they don’t have to face it alone.
If you feel like your child is struggling with emotional regulation or transitions, talk to an occupational therapist for further guidance. Contact MoveAbout today. Check out our Facebook and Instagram pages for more education regarding sensory processing and regulation.
